Over the past few weeks I have been reflecting on life in my twenties as in just a few months I will be turning 30. In this state of reflection I began compiling a list of 30 lessons learned, however the list has already grown to many more than that so here are the first 30.
Hopefully there is someone out there who can learn these lessons by reading them rather than having to live them out:
1) Tragedies are only unspeakable if you give them the power to be.
2) Do not settle for the one who says they want you while their actions leave you feeling unwanted. Someone, someday will say it and show it.
3) Some people will take pieces of you that you may never get back, but in doing so they reveal deeper parts of you which you may have never known existed. Be grateful for what they revealed, not resentful for what they removed.
4) The first step towards freedom is identifying what you are enslaved to.
5) Don’t waste your time waiting around for someone who consistently wastes your time.
6) Give yourself time to take care of yourself when you are feeling drained. Do yoga, walk a labyrinth, dance, drive around, get lost in music, just do something that revitalizes your energy. (For an instant uplift give yourself 7 minutes to listen to Burgs by Mt. Wolf)
7) Regardless of how impossible it seems, pursue the dream that is in your heart. Even if you fail, you win because you did not let the fear of failure stop you.
8) Smile at one stranger every day.
9) Do not place your heart in the hands of someone who says, “I used to love him/her.” This person does not understand what love is.
10) Create a house that feels like a home, not a museum. A tiny house filled with laughter, imagination, stories, books, and love is so much more valuable than a mansion filled with empty space.
11) Going to a foreign country alone awakens beautiful parts of yourself and you will come back a transformed person.
12) Listen to your body…slow down, rest, drink the green juice, eat the chocolate.
13) Dress to de-stress, not to impress. Let your wardrobe reflect how comfortable you are with yourself, not how uncomfortable you are with how others perceive you.
14) When a stranger asks you to dance, dance! Don’t hide behind, “I don’t dance.”
15) Do not attempt crow pose in the middle of the stockyards after a few drinks and countless hours of dancing. Contrary to what your mind tells you - It doesn’t make for a good picture, and you might fall forward and injure yourself.
16) Go to bed early, wake up early.
17) Give yourself one day a week of no plans, no obligations, no schedule.
18) Your mental health is more valuable than a paycheck.
19) Don’t eat Captain Crunch while watching Friends and taking a bath. Friends leads to laughing which may lead to choking, and you don't want to be remembered as the one who died in the bathtub by choking on Captain Crunch.
20) Blow a kiss to your dogs and tell them how much you love them before you leave the house. They need to know.
21) It’s okay to be confused at times about what you want, but never be confused about what you deserve. You know you’ve been healing when you are no longer afraid to want what you want, and what you want is in alignment with what you deserve.
22) If you’re ever asked to choose between someone who stayed after seeing your worth and someone who was willing to lose you to see your value – choose wisely.
23) If you find yourself obsessively checking for a message from someone for more than 3 days (or in my case, 1 year) just go ahead and block their number, email, social media, etc. In doing so you set yourself free from the anxiety of wondering, you give the power back to yourself, and you rid your life of a person incapable of treating you with the respect you deserve.
24) Forgive. Forgive everyone. In all of your forgiving, be sure to forgive yourself.
25) It is better to sleep alone every night for the rest of your life than to spend a single moment in the arms of someone who is only holding you out of obligation or loneliness.
26) Tell the people you love that you love them, loudly and often.
27) Drink less coffee & more herbal tea.
28) Choose yourself by vowing to never beg anyone to choose you. Remember, the most beautiful relationship is not measured by how far & long someone is willing to chase you but rather by the startling realization that neither of you wants to run. Hearts are not playgrounds.
29) You are allowed to ask questions. Any question about any subject. And keep asking them until you get an answer that satisfies your thirst for understanding.
30) Every person has a story to share, but so many are scared to be vulnerable and speak openly about their path. Maybe your story alone is not destined to change the world, but your courage may inspire someone else to embrace theirs. Perhaps the purpose of you sharing your story is to inspire the voice of another whose story is destined to change the world.
Part 2 will be coming your way on my actual 30th, December 16th!
Don't forget to pick up your copy of my book, Sacred Phoenix, here!